Archive for February, 2010
One distinction I have to make over and over again. Anxiety is thinking about what you do not want to have happen. That is hardwired into our systems. No breakthrough session will ever take away the choice we have to imagine the worst case scenario. Unlike Phobias which are one time learning events, clearing anxiety is about managing our thoughts and states on a moment to moment basis.
Here I am the “courage coach” sharing a moment of Terror on a not even very big hill the other day when I was cross country skiing. For those who don’t know, XC skis are not as easy to control or steer down a hill as down hill skis are. I’m still new at this and learning how to control my speed going down hill has been challenging for me.
check it out:
Need more help?
Explore these options:
- 17 Secrets To Crush Anxiety & Get Your Life Back!
- Clear The Fear Fast Home Study System
- Clear The Fear Boot Camp (aka “Retreat” aka “Learning Vacation”)
- One On One Coaching With Mark Shepard
Please note:
Because of the huge amount of Spam I’ve been getting, I’ve had to close the comments feature of this blog.
If you have questions you can either
- Call me at 888-598-7709,
- E-mail me at mark [at] MarkShepard.com
Or you can fill out the form below and I’ll contact you. Thanks! – Mark
You probably already know this intellectually. In case this is new for you. Here’s the deal. Your unconscious mind does not know the difference between what is real and what is imagined. So if you focus on bad things happening, your body is going to react as if it is really happening.
A lot of the folks I work with seem to know this consciously but on an unconscious level they are still focusing on what they don’t want. Instead. FOCUS ON WHAT YOU WANT. That’s it. Over and over again when you catch yourself focusing on what you do not want, gently turn your attention to what you want.
So here’s a way to get it in where it will hopefully stick. It’s a song about focus. I put together a little slide show to go with the music so that hopefully it will help to give you a visual as well as an auditory “anchor”.
Please leave a comment below and come back to play this song frequently.
Need more help?
check out:
- 17 Secrets To Crush Anxiety & Get Your Life Back!
- Clear The Fear Fast Home Study System
- Clear The Fear Boot Camp (aka “Retreat” aka “Learning Vacation”)
- One On One Coaching With Mark Shepard
Please note:
Because of the huge amount of Spam I’ve been getting, I’ve had to close the comments feature of this blog.
If you have questions you can either
- Call me at 888-598-7709,
- E-mail me at mark [at] MarkShepard.com
Or you can fill out the form below and I’ll contact you. Thanks! – Mark
When nothing seems to work…
When all the best tools and techniques seem to be doing nothing to stop your relentless anxiety…
When all the best plans seem to have failed to give you what you thought and hoped and prayed they would give you. Relief from the pain. Money in the bank. Love. Fitness. Success. Peace. Health. Calm. Joy.
There are still choices.
1. Give up.
Blame the course, the teacher, the coach, the practitioner. Blame God. Blame your parents. Blame your genetics. Blame yourself. Blame. Blame. Blame. It’s fun! All the cool kids are doing it.
2. Give in.
The course was good, the teacher well meaning. The coach was the best. He or she has helped so many people. But it just didn’t work for you.
3. Get to work.
Obsessively and compulsively practice. Flood your monkey mind with love. And keep pushing it. Keep the pressure on. Keep doing the work step after step after step. On every epic journey there are moments when the best are tempted to give up, to give in. then there is that moment of choice where they take a deep breathe and get to work.
Roll up the sleeves. Persist. Persevere. Pretend it’s supposed to be this way. There’s a purpose. Enjoy the process.
Shackleton knew he would not reach the south pole. He gave up that goal. He gave in to the idea that the pole was not meant to have his name on it.
Then he got to work keeping his men alive and getting them back home.
4. Then there is another way altogether. Just Stop. Stop and get really quiet.
This is your life. You are creating it every moment with your thoughts and your focus.
Stop the blame. Stop the self pity. Stop stopping your self with mental traps and double binds.
What if you saw the process of freaking yourself out as an incredible pattern designed to protect you? It’s quite the accomplishment isn’t it? It’s a complex program of behavior woven over the years.
How does it serve you? How is it perfect? What does it get you? Who would you be without it?
Start to focus on what you want. Focus on it with the same passion and fierceness with which you were clinging to your faults, your weaknesses, your failures.
Get back on the bike and ride. Get back into your life and live it.
No matter what I say. No matter what techniques I teach you ultimately it comes down to you. I can’t change for you.
Change or don’t change. The world outside goes on doing whatever it does whether you change or not. That world just is. It’s not about you at all.
There’s another world. The world inside. That world is all you. Inside you is where all your reactions are created. All your interpretations. All of your filters and definitions are in you.
The outside world you can not change. The inside world you can change because you create it.
As a wise man once pointed out to me, “Whether you make yourself miserable or make your life magical, the amount of effort is the same.”
Do you need help?
Check out the Anxiety Crushing tools and resources available to you in the Members Center
Clear the Fear Home Study System
Here’s a song I wrote that I think you just might be able to relate to. Play it over and over again. Let it get stuck in your head. It’s got some advanced language patterns embedded in the lyrics that can really help “re-program” your mind.